Happy birthday to moi!!!
Effectively I’ve lived 2 decades and a quadrennium (yeah, I checked all that). It’s been an interesting journey so far. This year alone has had lots of its own lessons, good times & awesome times. I will love to share my story, but that will take a whole book. Cause it’s difficult for me to leave out the tiny tiny details. So I’m gonna instead share lessons from the past 24 years that I can remember. Then in the future, when Christ tarries, maybe you’ll learn the whole story. The lessons:
On Living for God
- Loving God and working hard to live for Him doesn’t exempt you from horniness. Most times you’d fall to secret practices like masturbation and pornography, but eventually you grow and get to understand Him better. Making the shackles fall off. Not all at once, but gradually and with dedicated consistency.
- It’s very easy to confuse the sacred and the secular/natural. Often, you strive to be holy & set apart in some activities. However, what He wants is to be set apart in the wholeness of your life. Thus all the natural activities should be done to honour Him too. “Take your everyday ordinary life – your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life — and place it before God as an offering.” [Rom 12:1 MSG]
- God chooses what to teach you at every point in time. Your journey with Him isn’t dependent on your timing, but His. And oh, you repeat classes and programs often with God. If you don’t learn the lesson, the situation will keep coming till you do.
- The word of God is singular, but it stretches to fill all things. There is a word for all you go through, all you deal with. The actual question is whether you will use the word as an altimeter for your actions. His word is living and breathing and breaks you when necessary.
On Friendships & Relationships
- Family is important when you’re “adulting”. Yeah, sometimes you may feel uncertain pressure about certain issues. No matter how mature you think you are, sometimes a few minutes with mommy or daddy on the phone over an issue helps clear your head. As a young person, learn to take advice from your parents, with a goal of learning the principles. Learn the principles from your parents and apply it per your own context.
- Friendships between the opposite sex can last and be very fruitful. You can love another person as Jonathan and David did. It’s all a matter of choice and choosing to do so every time a problem arises. I marked 4 years of great friendships with some of my awesome friends. It’s been only 4 years, but it feels like I’ve known them forever.
- Don’t only take from your friendships or relationships. Be someone that provides value, as much as take it. Read, research, listen, watch, learn so much that you can be a source of encouragement to a friend. It shouldn’t always be you who’s being supported, support the others too. Create an atmosphere of learning and sharing with your friends and you’d be amazed the depths of things you begin to understand.
- Being in love and finding a soul mate and all that as a Christian young lady can be hard sometimes. When you do, you have to deal with sieving all the truths, lies, half truths, etc. you’ve heard about relationships. It’s a good thing to unlearn some things and re learn others. Most especially, your fellowship with God should feature these conversations. When you feel bad about desiring another person either than Him, the conversations you’ve had previously can help you understand that He wants you to love a man. He wants you to love and desire a man, not to take His place, but to join you in the secret place with Him.
On Passion & Purpose
- Your love for doing something can be your doing or undoing. When you enjoy doing something so much, it’s easy to want to create a life out of it. But sometimes bringing strings of survival into that action can make you loose the joy of doing it. Enjoy the things you do easily and freely and which make you happy & fulfilled. However, don’t just stay at the level of passion. Develop that thing, grow in it, become better at it every single time. Maybe eventually it may lead to making some cash. If it doesn’t lead to cash, don’t fret & panic, stay consistent at doing it. You’ll reap results from it later in a different way.
- Purpose isn’t like a train that’s always moving. Sometimes you can hear, feel and even see it. At other times too, you’ll be absolutely clueless and purposeless. That’s just how you learn sometimes, don’t kill yourself trying to find purpose. Grow in the things your heart is drawn to. Develop those senses, crafts, values and ideas that you see influence the world and show God’s glory to those who’d see it. Never let the understanding and seeking of fulfilling purpose create a chasm between you and God (the one who gave you that purpose).
- No matter where you find yourself, it’s possible to connect with your passion. You may be unable to connect in your usual ways. It’s likely you even cannot see the connections, yet you’re being builded by each experience. Probably a character being built to help you sustain that passion. Or a squad of supporters, helpers being rallied to help unleash that innate ability when you’re ready.
- The big picture should be a relevant way of seeing life. Dwelling on the current can demoralise or even destabilise you. Looking forward to all the great you can do and become becomes a way to keep going. Pressing forward through trials, building capacity and the character that goes with a fulfilling future.
- So much can happen in a year. You can literally die and be resurrected and maybe die again. Lol. Honestly, there’s so much that can happen to you which will completely overhaul in one year what it took you about 20 years to build. Some defences just break down, mindsets get challenged and perseverance tested. Knowing the worth of time can let you appreciate these things when they’re happening. Or maybe later, lol. Just know that one year is a long and short time for so much to happen.
- When you’re bored, what do you do? How do you spend the time when doing chores and stuff? It’s become apparent to me that the “unaccounted for time” is more than the “in-the-present-and-aware time”. You’ll be better off supplementing mundane activities with learning. Not notebook and pen to take notes kind of learning oh. But just I’m gonna listen to this podcast, sermon, bible guide, audiobook, etc. whilst I walk to work, or wash my dishes or do the laundry. When you’re unaware, your brain picks so much more and can dwell on so much more evil. So what would you rather your subconscious picks up? Feed that to it when you’re in the “unaware” time periods.
- Time can’t be replaced or returned. You should spend your time on the things & people that matter to you. Don’t allow others blackmail you into spending your time in a way you wouldn’t appreciate. Enjoy apportioning your time according to how much returns you want to get.
- Sleeping too much can be counterproductive, but sometimes that’s all you can really do. In such times, let something that will be useful in the future be playing. I believe the spirit doesn’t sleep, so you can feed it. So it’s stronger and able to assist you when you finally wake up and life comes at you! [Disclaimer: this is no doctor’s advice oh]
On People Management
- The next person, though they may smile like you, never can be like you. People wouldn’t think and process things the way you do. They would like you to see from their perspectives, but never for once wear your own glasses. Learning to remind yourself of this will save you so much trouble.
- Dealing with humans is one of the most stressful jobs ever. Since no man is an island, you have to learn to deal with them. It’ll be a roller coaster of emotions. If you’re like me, you’ll wonder if there’s a problem with you and all that. But charley, people are just people and will always be.
- Turning your experiences with people into a wisdom armour can help you deal better. You allow the experiences with them to teach you, give you essential knowledge. Then in each peculiar situation, you understand the context & apply the knowledge gained. It won’t always be easy to do, but it’s possible yeah!
- You’re blessed if you can act. It’ll help you buffer a lot of these difficult human relations. You can act happy even when you’re angry and want to cut someone. Eventually the act (if not kept on for too long), can help you actually be happy. The usual fake it till you make it. But whilst in the process of faking, you actually commit time to learning about how you’re feeling. Then you can better deal with such situations, spot triggers and handle them better.
On Mentorships, Networks and Work
- Mentors don’t always come with the title. At times you’d have to consciously make the effort to connect. Reach out to ask for the individual’s mind about issues. Submit to their authority and take their advice even when it’s hard. They wouldn’t always be people ahead of you, sometimes they are your friends.
- Strange people can become great friends. When networking with others, don’t always look forward to what they can give you. Also make an effort to provide some value to the other person. You build stronger relationships when you give than when you’re always waiting to receive.
- No matter how mature you become, there’s always something new to learn. Fighting your own developed ways of doing things can be hard. However, when you’re able to breakthrough and get in a new way of doing things, you’ll thank yourself later. Try as much as possible not to become stuck in your ways because you think you’re old in age.
- Offer helping hands to people in your workplace. Do your work and learn to do theirs too when you can or they ask for help. Your experience is yours to gather in a workplace, it’s the only thing no one has control over. Instead of bickering & complaining, become a doer and helper.
There’s always so much to glean from all you go through in life. If not immediately, sometimes in retrospect, you can catch the “Reve”. As much as possible, look back not always with regret, but with a hint of optimism. Optimism that appreciates all you’ve been through & teaches the future you.
Is there any particular thing you can connect to? Or some nuggets you’d want to add? Please say something in the comments!
All Rights Reserved. Mimi’s Passion © 2018.