Stories to tell

Has your curiosity ever led you astray? Your search for knowledge lead you down a path of pleasure intertwined with guilt?

As I type out this testimony, the only song that keeps ringing in my head is Ada’s testimony and it accounts for the title of this post. God has always been in the business of saving people. I decided to do a feature of friends’ stories- how they were able to navigate through life’s problems. I pray it’ll bless and encourage you.

I was excited about it, it was my first wet dream. This meant I was growing and a normal boy, but I sought to know more, will the semen ever run out?” 

Well I couldn’t have known the answer to my question without an experiment. That was 8 years ago, and this demon has held me bound and left me feeling guilty and condemned more times than ever. Unfortunately, most of my friends were Christians who were attaining perfection and took their God serious, and so the guilt doubled or tripled whenever I was around them. Now I’m free and the best part is, I’ve been reconciled with God even as I took the risk to go out there and reconcile the world to Christ.

I started masturbating after I graduated from junior high, awaiting admission into senior high. I woke up to a fairly wet underwear, one fine morning and upon investigation, realised it was my first wet dream. I was very excited about it, as it meant I was growing. The next moment was just heightened curiosity about what this meant and how much  semen actually existed in a lifetime.Fortunatlely for me, I had been feeding on a lot of porn, and knew exactly what to do to fulfil my curiosity. That day in my room with the door locked and my mom gone to work, I initiated myself into the man’s world of masturbation. The excitement and pleasure I felt was high over the fence and overflowing, giving me  go ahead to do this, thrice in just one day. The pleasure was exhilarating, and I wanted more of what I felt so I ignored the pain that ensued upon continuous practice. All I needed was a place that I was all by myself, I could masturbate up to 6 times a day and felt excruciating pain as I didn’t apply any lotion like I’d seen in the porn I watched. Yet, it never deterred me from continuing this practice. This continued for years, throughout senior high, right to the university, it became a habit: an addiction, an asylum that I turned to in times of grief, betrayal, boredom. It became an essential part of me: my own skeletons in the cupboard. Nevertheless, the pleasure wasn’t enough to drive the guilt away. The more I practiced, the more guilty I felt, since I was going to church too and had Christian friends, whom I felt all was going well for.

The guilt drove me to seek justification for my actions and finally to seek help to stop. I read books but never made the words into any action, and I got plunged deeper down the hole of darkness. The light that came, came during a recent vacation- a roommate invited me to join them for village missions, which I agreed to and went, knowing very well that I wouldn’t have space and time to do my thing, yet twas a risk worth taking. It was during that time that I began telling myself that I couldn’t go out to preach a sanctuary to people that I hadn’t entered into and sought refuge myself. For the first time in my life, I began to seek God with all of me and asked that He help me out of this. It took time and constant fellowship with God, I was tempted several times but by the grace of God I overcame. Not because I was scared but because I had found something greater than temporary pleasure interlaced with pain. I had found Jesus and He was more than everything I longed for. Through His guidance, I learnt not to sin so grace may abound more, I began to appropriate the grace I was freely given by pursuing God with all I have, I had become a truly new creation. I came to understand that my body was God’s temple and so nothing unclean could be kept there.I’ve been clean for just a few months, but I’m grateful to God that, indeed I’ve been made a new creation. The word of God indeed does transform and make new. My mortal body has been quickened by the indwelling Holy Spirit of God, leading me on towards perfection in holiness. God bepraised. My heart now seeks God: to know Him more dearly and follow Him more nearly.

Whoever you are out there, whatever you’re facing, I want to encourage you to sit tight, God sees everything and He knows just the right time to come through for you. You don’t need to and can’t will yourself to stop, some things are just greater than you. Just be prepared to receive God’s mercy when it comes.

1. What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin, that grace may abound?    Romans 6:1 

2. So then it is not of him that willeth, nor of him that runneth, but of God that sheweth mercy.    

Romans 9:16 KJV

3. And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.     

Romans 12:2 KJV

4. What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own?            

  1 Corinthians 6:19 KJV

5. Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.      

James 4:7 KJV

6. As the hart panteth after the water brooks, so panteth my soul after thee, O God.       

Psalms 42:1 KJV

Mimispassion © 2016


About Enam Ami Agbozo

I thrive in these areas: Content Marketing, Business Writing, Blogging, Ghostwriting, Social Media Marketing, Youth Mentoring, Ideas Structuring, Public Speaking, Educational Content Creation. My joy is to see every individual I come into contact with see life as more than a job, getting money or buying luxury. I enjoy sharing what I've learned with people I meet and also learning from their experiences.

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20 Comments on “Stories to tell”

  1. Waoh!! This is huge, i have been a victim of certain habit or the other and my finding were that it Always difficult for anyone to get delieverance from an habit one has grown with over a period of years.
    But in this post am excited to know that your friend has found the truth. The scriptures says”resist the devil and he will flee from thee”.
    Habits develop can eighter make us or mess us up. Before it too late letake a 360 degree turn around from the path of destruction. For every worldly fulfilment is temporary.
    Thanks for sharing…

            Psalms 27:1 The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? the LORD is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid? 27:2 When the wicked, even mine enemies and my foes, came upon me to eat up my flesh, they stumbled and fell. 27:3 Though an host should encamp against me, my heart shall not fear: though war should rise against me, in this will I be confident. 27:4 One thing have I desired of the LORD, that will I seek after; that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the LORD, and to enquire in his temple. 27:5 For in the time of trouble he shall hide me in his pavilion: in the secret of his tabernacle shall he hide me; he shall set me up upon a rock. 27:6 And now shall mine head be lifted up above mine enemies round about me: therefore will I offer in his tabernacle sacrifices of joy; I will sing, yea, I will sing praises unto the LORD. 27:7 Hear, O LORD, when I cry with my voice: have mercy also upon me, and answer me. 27:8 When thou saidst, Seek ye my face; my heart said unto thee, Thy face, LORD, will I seek. 27:9 Hide not thy face far from me; put not thy servant away in anger: thou hast been my help; leave me not, neither forsake me, O God of my salvation. 27:10 When my father and my mother forsake me, then the LORD will take me up. 27:11 Teach me thy way, O LORD, and lead me in a plain path, because of mine enemies. 27:12 Deliver me not over unto the will of mine enemies: for false witnesses are risen up against me, and such as breathe out cruelty. 27:13 I had fainted, unless I had. believed to see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living. 27:14 Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the LORD.

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  2. I thank God that he was able to over come. Truly, when we make up our mind that we want to stand with God and cry out to Him for help to overcome certain habits, God always comes true for us. However, we have our part to play.. we have to yarn for the change and walk in the change. God ain’t our house boy to do everything for us.. He is our Father and friend who is willing to walk all the miles with us. And am glad He pointed that out in his life narration. I am blessed by this because I too am an overcomer and may God bless Him for sharing.

  3. Shall we keep on sinning so that grace may abound……..?
    As he has being delivered, may God deliver every other.

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